Friday, 7 August 2009

Strictly Speculation...

The title might be a rehash from last year, but a lot of the contestants under speculation are the same ones from last year anyway!

The biggie, the one we have been talking about for what feels like a year now, is the one and only Sharon Osborne! The first thing I think about when I consider Sharon is just that she is so wee! At 5"2 she just has to be dancing with Vincent if she's in it. Or Darren if there is a dearth of short women this year. But that is is the big question- IS SHE IN IT? I get the feeling the BBC would have stopped the rumours before now if she wasn't but the whole thing just seems so utterly random! Sharon doing a Viennese Waltz?! Sharon in a fringed bright pink jive dress?! More importantly...Sharon taking stick from the judges?! Could be exciting...
Moving on to another complete randomer, Chris Moyles. He keeps talking about it on his show, but says he keeps being asked and saying no. I don't really think there's too much milage in this one myself. Although I would like to see him take on Erin, he'd infuriate her!

Turning to the stock characters of every other series, we have a usual gaggle of out-of-work soap stars, newsreaders and GMTV presenters under suspicion. I think Kara Tointon seems very likely as she has nothing else to do and will fit the 'perma-tanned semi-hottie' slot they always have. Staying with Eastenders, Natalie Cassidy is also in the frame, although I think she has been for about three years now. Has she had a dramatic weight loss/gain recently? If not, she might need to go on the show just so we remember she's still alive. Obviously if either of these two are on they will have to dance with Darren. If both are on, it will have to be a threesome. He appears to have some sort of monopoly over Eastenders women.

In the old-man-corner (a very over-crowded category last year!) we have Reece Dinsdale from Corrie, which would be so dull I fear for any new dancer getting saddled with him, although it did work for Kristina...

A much more exciting old man is Richard Madeley. Now I know everyone else is groaning over this, but I simply cannot wait! It'll be like Andrew Castle but 100 times funnier! He'll take it so seriously and humiliate his kids and generally brighten up the whole thing. Hilarious. In a laughing at not laughing with way. He just needs the perfect partner. He's 6"2...maybe Erin? Ooh we do like to be mean to Erin.

There haven't been any Casualty/Holby City rumours that I know of (yet), but if the BBC are caught short this year I'm sure they'll find someone for James Jordan to bully. I also really hope we do not have to suffer Penny Smith or any other GMTV presenter. That's really all just for free advertising on ITV!

I'm not going to comment on any sportspeople because, quite frankly, we never know who they are and really don't care until the show starts. Plus remember the boredom vortex that was Mark Foster and Hayley Who last year? I also refuse to believe any Royal family rumours. Zara deja-vu Phillips, anyone? Other re-run rumours from last year include Esther Bennett, Teddy Sheringham and Alice Beer. None of whom seem ready to set the dancefloor on fire.
Now take a look around these contestants... is it me or does this not look too much like the 'young and sexy' SCD that everyone seems to think the BBC are after? Last year the youngest contestant was 27 (when you think they've had 17 year olds on the show that's pretty odd) and Natalie Cassidy and Kara Tointon are 26. Plus, Kara is the only regulation semi-hottie that I can see! I am really hoping the BBC have some cool people hidden up their sleeves!

1 comment:

Uncle Dick Madeley said...

'Old man'! I'll give you old man. It's comments like this that stopped me appearing on the show.