Who's who? No, really.

So here we are welcoming the Class of 2019 and the most striking comment I can make from the start is ... who the fleckerl are they? I am so pop-culturally inept that I am used to not knowing a considerable number of contestants. I don't watch much sport; I don't watch soaps. I was muchos smug about having heard of last year's Youtuber, despite being in my mid-30s, but no such luck this year. Other than Jamie Biscuits (who is moot now) and Challenge Anneka, I'm pretty much stumped. Having said that, we all have to admit that it doesn't really matter. We get to know them as they go along, following their... you know the word... and it's always a joy when someone you'd barely heard of to the point of questioning their very right to be on the show, wins your heart and lifts the glitterball (Abbey She's-Only-On-It-Because-Of-Her-Marriage Clancey.) With new judge Motsi making the judging panel the most ballroom/latin-esque it's ever been, and the Glitterball gaining an extra plinth (cue Miranda Hart style nod to camera), I'm open to it being a really great series. Bring it on...

Catherine from Corrie and the Guy Who Prompted a Controversial Conversation about Blackpool

Clover Awareness Rating 0 - I don't watch Corrie

She looked darling in a sugarplum fairy dress, and looked like she could be sort of solid in the group dance. It'll be interesting to see what Johannes can do now he's been promoted to the main cast. Catherine doesn't have the vibe of triple-threat stage school brat, so she potentially could be a middly-starter with a journey ahead (yes, I said it). If their partnership has laughter and chemistry they could be ones to watch.

Saffron Youtuber and AJ

Clover Awareness Rating - 0 

Now I think of it, this was an obvious pairing and one that is heading to be Tabloid-Fodder. With his now Reality-TV-Famous-Brother, cutie-pie-faced AJ and an influencer make perfect sense for the yoof vote and social media coverage. She looked a little nervous and wooden in the group routine, but why wouldn't she be? Like Joe last year, she's as close to a 'normal person' doing Strictly as you can get. And I still defend the right of Youtubers and Reality TV stars taking part in the show. It would have jarred 12 years ago, but they're legit celebs in today's culture and I'm happy for them to be represented... even if I have no idea who they are.

Alex Scott and Neil Jones

Clover Awareness Rating - 0 - I hardly know any footballers, female or otherwise

This is the first partnership I'm excited about. Alex is a prime candidate for a real Strictly story, coming from a sports background but having the supreme good luck of also having the ability to look amazingly glam in sequins. Neil is potentially a new series darling, having been in the show's background for a few years and in the spotlight for all the wrong (but heart-wrenching, to use a Tabloidy phrase) reasons. Rumours prevail about Neil's choreography ability. If they're true, here could be dynamite. Here's hoping.

Michelle and Giovanni

Clover Awareness Rating - 0 - Nope, sorry.

No, sorry, despite all the excitement on our Twitter feed, I have not heard of her. She did seem to have rhythm in the group dance so I'm thinking she could be one of this series' dark horses. I think Giovanni has the sense to let her be good, instead of a joke. I'm glad she didn't get Anton. 

Emma Eastenders and Anton

Clover Awareness Rating - 3 - I recognise her face, if not her name

This was a bit of a surprise actually. Like many, I just assumed Anton would get Challenge Anneka. I got an inkling that Emma might be hiding a bit of disappointment but I could have picked up on that completely wrong. These two scream to be middle-grounders again, with a touch of Anton-humour thrown in. If she can't dance, all the better. If she can, it's a shame.

A Viscountess Called Emma and Aljaz

Clover Awareness Rating - 0

There's something about the current political climate that makes me distinctly take agin anyone with a title. I'll try not to, as she seems lovely, and was actually one of celebrities that stood out in the group number. Aljaz is always a joy so they could be a pair to watch if she can win over the public. 

Challenge Anneka and Kevin from Grimsby

Clover Awareness Rating - 10 - I have had to give her a ten because she's the only one still in it I had actually heard of, which basically shows how old I am.

Yes, yes, I remember her darting about on TV in the late 80s and early 90s. Do I think she'll be good? No. Do I think she'll give it a good shot? Yes, but I don't think it'll help. In a way, she'd have had a better chance of going further with Anton. My prediction for a very early exit.

David James and Nadiya Who

Clover Awareness Rating - 2 - I did not recognise the name but his face looks vaguely familiar

Goalies don't have the best track record on Strictly. He's paired with a pro who's apparently been on for a few years yet still seems weirdly unfamiliar. He might win a few sports fan votes in the early episodes but again, I can't see these two going very far.

James and Luba

Clover Awareness Rating - 3 - Name very familiar but couldn't have picked him out of  crowd

Back when Great Britain didn't even win any medals, the rowers won medals. Cue many jokes about him not being able to sit down whilst dancing. I bet they give him a chair as a prop. Or a boat. Or at least an oar. Luba is a bit of an unknown so it's tricky to know how this will go. I'm not hopeful after seeing the group dance. 

Karim and Amy

Clover Awareness Rating - 0

No idea who he is but he really shone in that group number. He's trained in ballet so the ringuh bells a ringin' already - but everyone knows a boy ringer gets off lightly (Tom Chambers, Jay McGuinness, Joe McFadden.) Amy burst out with some cracking routines last year - including, in my humble opinion, the best jive of the series, so these two are definitely on my list of ones to watch...

Chris Hebburn and Karen

Clover Awareness Rating - 4 - I had no idea what his name was but I definitely recognise him from a sitcom

I wholly approve of his accent.

Jamie Biscuits and Queen Oti

Clover Awareness Rating - 10 - I got quite into Made in Chelsea for a couple of seasons

Arrrrgh, I actually would have loved this pairing. What a disappointment. He has been replaced by the young boy who was adopted by Jack Sugden ( I used to watch soaps...) On the whole, I'm just glad Oti is still taking part. That would have been quite the loss.

Mike Bushell and Katya

Clover Awareness Rating - 0

He's got a cracking partner but he really does look as though he's going to need it. Katya managed to get some good routines out of the clearly rhythm-blind Seann Walsh so perhaps all is not lost. But some definitely is.

Dev and Dianne

Clover Awareness Rating - 0

Dianne's popularity will have soared in the last 12 months. Dev also stood out in the group routine but DJs just don't have the best track (haha, sorry) record on the show. I really hope he can turn the table (haha, sorry) on that. 

Will and Janette

Clover Awareness Rating - 0

I'm running out of things to say at this point as, yet again, I'm not quite sure who he is but I am looking forward to seeing what he can do. Janette can be very 'hit and miss' (no, that wasn't a table tennis joke...) with her choreography. Who's betting they dance to the ping-pongy Enrique song?