Warning: Rant Imminent

Well, first of all I'm after sympathy. I'm writing this purely with my left hand as my right thumb was aggressively savaged by...a mirror. You might not believe me that the first thought that went through my head went I saw the (horrific - you could see the bone, I swear...) injury was 'Oh God, I need that hand for salsa!' but it's truestory. So, if you can find it in your hearts to send out some wee little kind thoughts to my injured digit, I'd much appreciate it. So, rather than dancing myself, I've been forced merely to speculate on this year's forthcoming Strictly series instead (though I actually did go to salsa class anyway and still had fun laughing at gratuitous hippage of a thou-shalt-not-be-named old salsero...but less of that...it makes me sound more bitchy than I am...ish ).

Soo, Strictly, eh? Am I pleased that they've replaced Arlene with Alesha? Ha, no. I think it's more ridiculous than the thought of Jeremy Clarkson joining the Royal Ballet and declaring himself 'partial to the French.' Frankie's too kind. I kinda agree that it's not Alesha's fault and yes, she is going to spend most of the series having to defend herself against hateful cynics (like moi) who think it's a travesty she's even allowed to touch the paddles. But what qualifications does she have to judge? Being a contestant is not enough - surely that's a no-brainer. To ditch a world-renowned choreographer for a mediocre pop singer (sorry, but it's true - she ain't no Beyonce...) is ludicrous. And yes, like Frankie, if I had to choose a judge to go it would have been Arlene. Last series very little of what she said made much sense and she does appear to slowly but steadily be morphing into Karen from Will & Grace. To replace her with Alesha though, is silly. It would have been far more sensible to replace her with Karen Hardy who is, after all, a trained ballroom and latin judge and is just as big a personality as Alesha - and no, perhaps she's not as 'glam' or as famous, but Strictly's a show where that doesn't matter...who honestly had heard of Len, Bruno or Craig before 2004?

The BBC is promising even more changes and rumours are rife as to what they will be. We know we will have to expect at least one new pro as Camilla left. I'd be surprised to see the return of Hayley Who who made less than an impact last series too. Perhaps they'll cut out some of the older pros - could it be the end for Darren and Lilia? Karen? Matthew? Ian? No, they'll keep Ian as he's useful for the very tall ladies...and Anton and Brendan are too big a part of the show to go... aren't they??? All I know is that there are sixteen celebs all waiting to be primmed and propered, glittered and glamoured, sequinned and sexed-up. My attention waned last year and my enthusiasm fizzled out. My expectations for this series are low...which means it could turn out be an absolute gem. But the cynic in me isn't so sure. Come on BBC, prove me wrong!