Saturday, 11 September 2010

Strictly Blind Date

Here we go then, everyone is decked out in their finery and Bruce has been brought out of the freezer, it's time to start the show!

I'm starting to think in purple. Just so yer know. Frankie blogged as she went along and my comments come with hindsight from watching the whole show. This really was a cracker. Waay better than a Cream Cracker; definitely a Tuc at least. It feels like the show has gone back to basics - but the basics are better. And that it's the dawn of a new Strictly era.

Group pro number

Perfect starter to the show. I totally didn't recognise Katya with her brown hair, thought it was someone new! Didn't notice the blingy new set until Clover texted me about it, thankfully Brucie pointed it out to us slow old people. Not 100% sure about the brown outfits, but I guess it might mean the grey elephant-skin material has finally run out and there's none left in the bargain bin

As for the contestant walk down, I loved Pamela Stevenson's wobble, feel sorry for whoever gets her when she can't manage some stairs. And can I point out Ann Widdecombe is not an MP anymore so is not the right honourable anything anymore, especially after jigging about on this show! Kara blatantly knows someone in wardrobe, as she has all the best outfits a la Kelly Brook. Loved Goldie's little jig down the stairs, really want him to be the 'gusto' contestant this year!

And it's kick-off time, and ooh look Peter Shilton is in the first batch, how punningly appropriate...

Scott and...NATALIE!

OOH she's got the big guns again this year! Wow, I guess being tall means she gets all the big men and there are no bean-poles like Chris Parker this year.

Natalie aka Arch Nemesis looked muchos pleasos with this partner. They were all standing there and they must have been playing the 'guess by height' name too, so it can't have been too much of a surprise to her. Because really, how Lowe can you go? *groooan*

Matt and...ALIONA!

Hey, this could work. He's a gymnast, she's wee, could be perfect. Matt is proving to be value for money, what with his promise to be incredibly cheesy and taking his partner out mud-samba-ing.

This might give Aliona a bit more of a go than last year. Wondering whether the Bad Girl of Ballroom persona will come fully into fruition this season, or last series' illegal lift was a minor blip. This couple look like what the Bennetts would look like if you stretched them.

Peter and...ERIN!

Wow, it is actually the law that Erin nearly always gets a sprotsman! Feel she's drawn the short straw yet again, more Willie Thorne than Colin Jackson, is that Natalie I can hear cackling away in Tess' Area? (which is a lot bigger this year *snigger*)

Flashback! Flashback! Last time she had a goalie (called Peter) Erin (aka Evil Genius) achieved nothing more than subjecting the general public to a veery odd kind of shoulder shimmy. It was sort of a shimmy. Gone very, very wrong. It's possible we should expect similar things of this partnership. Natalie 1 Erin 0.

The New Boys

I was expecting Let's Hear It For the Boys by Sinitta, but I guess a fab swishy paso will have to do! Strangely I will always think of Letitia Dean and her skirt lifting antics. Loved Aliona's gravity-defying lifts with Jared. And of course this is the only show where you can have fringed hotpants and feathers, yet somehow look a bit classier than usual.

This is it! This is what we have been missing. New boys! Jared is the new Brian. Only he looks about 12 (someone tweeted me saying that was generous - perhaps - but I am a giving person...) The other two were on fire - most particularly the partnership between Robin and Kristina.

Michelle and...BRENDAN!

So happy Brendan has Michelle, he deserves someone good after Jo Wood! Expecting lots of fun, flashy choreogrpahy already. Loving Michelle already, she's playing the loveable Yank to perfection.

Did you see Brendan's face? Couldn't believe his damned good luck. She seems competitive though and it's a trait that doesn't go down too well on female celebs. But the cutesly cuddsly Yank performance may work on us, if it pans out. It's novel if nothing else. Ya'll love her. Maybe.

Pamela and...JAMES!

Hah! Really don't think he deserved this, but then again he did have the good-ish Zoe Lucker last year. Saying that, Pamela has personality and what the Americans amusingly call spunk, so she won't take any hassle from him!

Now I was watching this girl in the group dance...and maybe it was a fluke, but my, she could dance. I totally didn't say that if she turns out to suckbigtime. But her timing seemed spot on and she was enjoying herself immensly. (Gosh was Zoe Lucker only last year? It's all a big GabbyZoePennyLaila mash these days to me.) Thing is, though, she said she wanted someone with a sense of humour. And then got James.

Tina and...JARED!

Wouldn't she have been perfect for Darren Bennett? *sigh* Anyway, Jared is cute and fun so they could be the new Tiny Little Cute Couple.

The new Louisa and Vincent. Love them like cupcakes.

Paul and...OLA!

I weep for the poor woman, I really do. She's bigger than him! Although I don't feel they will be getting as far as lifts. Oh well, at least he was nice to her, she'd better have the patience of a saint.
The girls all lined up, like they were on death row. The camera panned across their faces. "Not me...not me...not me..." And Ola, bless her. She did a good show of being delighted. Of course, she'll possibly have the attitude, OK, so I won last year, fair game. Perhaps he'll make her costume disappear mid-dance. It's not like there'd be much to get rid of anyway. And it would be a nifty diversion from what almost certainly will be awful, awful dancing.
Patsy and...ROBIN!
Erm...don't really know what to make of this really. Saying that, I am wary of the length of her dress, looks like we have a shy one. We'll have her in Kylie hotpants by week 4.

Her biog on the BBC website reads like a Dave Pelzer book, though. She's got a family full of eccentrics and done things you'd never expected, yada doo da - but still looks a million dollars. Kudos.

Goldie and...KRISTINA!

This is one of my favourite pairings already! Please don't let him be a duffer, let Kristina dance with someone good! He should at least know about rhythm and timing and woohoo he's enthusiastic!

I want him to be good but - and I'm hoping my eyes were deceiving me - in the dance at the end, he did look a bit drunkle-at-a-wedding (in the style of Gary THE HORROR! THE HORROR! Rhodes). Another one, like Patsy, who's had a couple of good runs around the mill (where is this mill people talk about?) Might be expected to be found in a sepia picture on the cover of a book entitled something like Why don't you like me? or My tragic upbringing: Read and weep. (Does what it says on the tin.) But no, fab DJ career and now Strictly? That's the spirit!

Pro number

I watched the opening with my mouth wide open, I suspected Flavia and Vincent were robots but I didn't know they could fly! My word, they are working these pros hard already. Love the light up dresses, where can I get one for popping down to the shops in?

Paul Daniels performing a levitation trick on Wee Vincent and Flavia I see. This is the last time I shall be using the prefix 'Wee' to describe Vincent. It hardly seems fair when there's now a toddler on the show.

Kara and...ARTEM

Loved the way Tess mumbled his last name! They looked happy since it was obvious both of them didn't know who the other was.

Frankie, how come you object to women in dresses with two sleeves, yet you claim a dress with one is the 'best costume'? You are a complex creature. And to think, I actually deliberately counted the sleeves on the ladycelebs' dresses tonight for you. 5, if you're wondering.

Jimi and...FLAVIA

Woo, man with rhythm for Flavia! Get to it girl, we will forgive you if you want to use Jai Ho again!

Alarm bells! Alarm bells! Oh no,'s J.I.M.I. not J.I.M.M.Y.; it's 2010, not 2007; and no one looks as though they're about to pop their cuban heels on the dancefloor (though let's try and speak to Ola after half an hour's training...) This guy can mooove. Without seeing any training footage or anything yet, these two are starting off as my favourites. Yes, Flavia will be kicking herself she wasted the Jai Ho! tango on Craig, but there's the whole soundtrack to Bombay Dreams to work through. What? Don't remember it? Fair point.

Gavin and...KATYA

And a nice man for Katya too. Is it me or do the male celebs seem to have a fair bit of potential this year? This is going to sound really silly, but I hadn't realised how Welsh Gavin Henson is!

Gavin is-he-a-bit-fick-or-a-bit-Welsh-or-both Henson looked completely bemused by the whole experience. Like he'd accidentally stumbled upon the set mistaking it for a beer. He thinks people know him for rugby, not for shaving his legs. No, honey, it is for shaving your legs. But roll with it, sunshine.

aka Dads' Army plus 4 wannabes.

Ok this is weird, Darren is not dancing with Lilia. Hold it together, do not cry, gather, gather...Thankfully the number is as camp as Christmas so we should get through all this. Is it just me or is Ballroom Blitz some sort of hybrid of the Time Warp and Walking on Sunshine? Dancing was obviously amazing, but really don't know what to make of it yet.

Yes, Darren without Lilia was...sad. The new boy reminds me of someone. Creepy. I think it's what Michael Buble would look like if he were in A Clockwork Orange.

Ann and...ANTON!

'This is a dancing competition, it is not a world war' little she knows! Well she had to have Anton, didn't she? She does at least have a sense of humour and isn't taking it too seriously, let the panto begin.
Obviously. And he has no right to moan about getting a good partner. And boy, I bet he knows it.

Felicity and...VINCENT!
Ah the Wee People, I didn't know she was so wee. Thankfully she is cloaked in sleeves as BBC regulations state no woman over 45 is allowed to bear her upper arms. She does at least look rather nice.

I love her. She's just beautiful. I'd love her to be elegant but, if I'm honest, I can see a little Cherie pie problem here. She may fuddle through the ballroom but the latin's going to be tricky. She's just too twee and British. Unfortunately, after a week or two, I imagine it will be (Rosemary and) Thyme to go. Ohhh, you love it really.

As with the choice of celebs, I think they've done really well with the pairings this year. Agreed. Nothing looks glaringly awful just yet. Anton hasn't danced yet, The group number didn't hold any surprises, Ann walking, Peter dad dancing, people staring at their feet. Nobody fell over. Shame.

Don't know about you, but I'm excited! MUCHOS!


flugella said...

Ooooh my tweet got a mention!!!!

Clover said...

It was a very fair point! ;-)

Anonymous said...

I was disappointed by the whole show! Missed the old pros...Ian, Matthew, Darren, Lilia :-(

Clover said...

Sad not to see old favourites, and as much as I love Matthew, Lilia, etc, I think for the sake of the show, the right decision has been made. I'm surprised that I've come to that conclusion myself, though.